For many, the first week of September 2011 will be remembered for an earthquake and hurricane hitting our region all within one week. For us it wasn't the force of natural disasters that rocked our world; our family will remember that first week of September for different reasons.
O and C were supposed to start preschool the week after Labor Day. I took the kids to the Doctor's office for their yearly shots and check up. O and A were supposed to have their appointment together and C's appointment was scheduled for 3 days later. Kell and I had been worrying about C's development for quite some time, and I just felt I needed C to be seen sooner. I called the Doctor's office and asked to switch C and O's appointment, and expressed some of my concerns with the nurse. We arrived to the office a little early, and I herded all three children into the waiting room. Anyone with multiple kids knows that a visit to the Doctor occurs frequently. My children are no stranger to the office and the staff all know us by name.
After just a few minutes of waiting, it was our turn. The nurse led A and C to the scale and measuring wall. A stood proudly on the scale and was excited to learn that he finally broke 60lbs and was well over 4 feet tall. C on the other hand wanted nothing to do with the scale. The nurse patiently tried and tried to coerce him to stand tall, and still but he just cried, jumped and fidgeted. She tried to ask him what the problem was, but at 3 years old, C can't talk. My face turned red, I broke out in a sweat, and had to count to ten before I explained that he wouldn't be able to tell her why he was scared. She had me hold his hands, and was finally able to get a weight and height on him.
We made our way to the examination room, and the nurse then asked for the history on the 2 boys. Of course O, being my outspoken child, wanted to put his two cents in, "C can't talk", he explained, "He has no words". I let that comment sink in. My 3 year old has no words. I went through C's history, though I knew it was all in the chart. C seemed, on paper, to be fine up until 15-18 months. He had a handful of words, had learned to walk, and though he was slower than his brothers with his development, seemed to be hitting the milestones within the "normal" range. Then somewhere around 20 months he just stopped, everything. He stopped talking, stopped trying, stopped learning, and even forgot many of the words he had learned before. Everyone told me not to worry, that he was just taking advantage of being the youngest child. They suggested that maybe we babied him too much. He can't run, can't jump, and doesn't seem to make sense of anything we say to him, unless he wants to. That can't be my fault, can it? She then asked about A, but of course, A is wonderful. He is an honor roll student, loves sports, reads above grade level, and is just a great kid.
A few minutes later the doctor came in. C and I were attempting to read a book, while the other two boys played a game on my phone. He observed C for a few minutes, repetitively turning pages and showing no interest in the words I was able to read before the next page was turned. The doctor sat in his chair and asked C to come over to him; C ignored him. He moved his chair closer and asked again, and then took C's hand and tried to hug him. "Tell me about C" he said to me.
I again went through what I had just explained to the nurse. "Could he have a hearing problem?" I asked. Could his ears be causing him to not be able to run, jump, and if he can't hear, wouldn't that explain his inability to communicate? I went over all of the health issues C had in the past, Scarlet Fever, Swine flu, unexpected and really intense belly aches, falls down the stairs, and I explained that he just doesn't let us know that he is sick, until his fever is blood boiling and he becomes lethargic.
The doctor had C demonstrate his run down the hallway, had him attempt to jump, and then examined his eyes and ears.
Then the dreaded... "Mrs. Russell, C's ears appear to be fine, but we will schedule him for an appointment with a hearing specialist to confirm. What I really think is that C is Autistic"... Then the room grew dark, his words seemed to fade away, I broke out in yet another sweat. How could this be? C, my loving and caring baby. The sweet face that wants so badly for everyone to understand his language, but that no one really gets. I had looked up Autism when I first began to suspect that something was not quite right, but he didn't seem to have the tell tale symptoms. Sure he stomped his feet and pounded his chest, but it was to the beat of his music (even though he sometimes was the only one that heard the song). Sure he wouldn't look people in the eyes, but it was just strangers eyes, wasn't it? Maybe I noticed that he had slight OCD when it came to toys or DVD's but wasn't that just because he loved them so much? The doctor then started writing prescriptions, for services, blood work, Kennedy Krieger (it just sounded scary), hearing tests, eye examinations. I started to feel over-whelmed. My beautiful baby was going to be poked and prodded, and pushed from here to there. The rest of the visit went by in a blur.
I hustled the children out of the office, and drove, with tears in my eyes, music blaring, and tried to keep my calm, as my children sat happily in the back seat.
I dropped them off to daycare, and there, after the kids ran outside, I cried, hysterically as I tried to recall all of the details, the people the doctor told me to call. On the news, in the background, they called for evacuation of the island, my one place of refuge.
On my way back to the Island I called Kell. In a fury, I told him the news, but forgot to tell him what kid I was talking about. After some confusion, he finally understood, C was Autistic.
And so the preparations for the hurricane began.
